a late evening thought.

I don’t want to do anything that could jeapordize our relationship.
I want to be with you forever.
I’m lucky cause you know this and still don’t use it to your advantage.

I love you…

Photo

My honey Antonio sent me this photo on MSN. I believe it’s taken 2 years ago give or take a few month.

Tech Tags: image photo picture girl woman

Nightmare

The reason why I’m writing this is because it’s been in my mind all day. I had three nightmares this night. The one I woke up to being the one that’s been on my mind.

Lead roles: An ex-friend of the female sex, my partner and myself.

Skipping all that’s irrelevant, my partner rode a motorcycle, she a car.
I was walking on the sideway in the direction towards them, I was quite far away but still on
the same road at them. When I saw them in the distat… the ex-friend hit the gas and
speeded past a long truck. The truck driver lost control of his veichle and the truck positioned it self sideways across both lanes. My partner crashed and a man got him
off the traffic and that’s when I had gotten so close that I was within a few feet from him.
For me it was terrible, I saw someone I love being unconscious, someone who always takes care of himself well and to me are immortal. I kept my eyes on him and had a chocked face, I felt I couldn’t move, like time stood still. That’s when his head came off, and I saw it fall down. Standing there and just watching in a can’t-believe state for perhaps 8 seconds I woke up from my sleep.

Even though dreams dresses up and don’t mean what is dreamt and even though I understand the
true meaning of this dream I’ve had it on my mind cause that’s not a nice thing to dream
about someone you love. So it has still bothered me, and still do. I can still see that picture
and still feel those feelings.

The true meaning of the dream: My ex-friend did things out of selfish reasons that
cannot be interpretated any other way than she wanted to mess my relationship up for me, make her look good infront of him by saying less nice things of me to him. Hence the EX-friend. So this dream represents that.

One thought.

Lack of trust creates hatred. – Solelyshe

Everything shapes us. To learn what comes out of what is fun.

Mixed post #3

Some words of wisdom inspires so greatly that it leads to new possibilities unimaginable.
Fantastic when that happens. I always enjoy being led further in my mind.

Have noticed my insecurity in my relationship. I realized it today. As myself I have no obvious insecurity, it is in my relationship. Always being afraid of how my partner will react to things. Which is ridiculous since he is the greatest. But it doesn’t have anything to do with him. It’s the aftershock of the ex. Always seen how my time with him has effected me in ways that are of no good. But today I am aware of more.
I have some things to deal with. Lucky my partner is an understanding and strong soul. His support and shoulder is needed. How could a person effect my mind this much?
Never mind that question.. I know the answer. Will not write it, though. It’s like you’ve been addicted to heavy drugs for some while and you get out of it with shakes and even years after you are still not completely free.

But healing is the only option.

hmm, been very blogative today.
Making up for lost time I suppose.
Rejuvenate through throwing out the trash.

Never let nobody tell you what’s bullshit. You decide what’s bullshit.

The Beauty Of Women.

The tenderness in her gestures seduces you.
The gentle approach she has mastered is satisfying you.
The lush, the curves, her closed eyes, makes you observe.
The force of her femininity, the lusciousness, attracts.
Graceful teasing to the utter extent.
Expands thoughts, grows desires intesive.

Lost within her lusts she allures her chosen captive.

Divinity…
Infinity.
/Me (C)

I have something to add. Something that some don’t wish to hear:
A man that blames a woman for seducing him has only his lack of discipline to blame.

Argue it, dispute it.
It lets me know things about you that you don’t want me know.

Tech Tags: poetry women poem beauty the of

Just podering.. (loudly)

I have gotten offers on modeling and acting on occasions but never given it much thought. Yes, there are more fake agencies than real ones but personally I don’t find them difficult to spot. My interest haven’t been for that kind of life before but now I am taking it under consideration for future dreams and plans.

Not only would money make my own life easier but I could aslo help others who are in need in different ways. And I think I would love acting, actually. I am not saying that I am sure that I could make money through it but with the possibility, that I could help others is it selfish to not try?

I got my mind right for that world and wouldn’t fall into traps. With that fact, is it selfish not to?

I could check up on some things to find out more. Not going into it with many hopes, perhaps is the good way if fortune comes or not. Suppose it makes you more grounded, down to earth. In the clouds our minds aren’t right.

Doubting modeling is for me, I don’t see how I could get anywhere there. But maybe there’s something in acting.

Just thoughts… crazy or not.

Beautiful photos